The top 3 reasons for choosing a humanist wedding ceremony
A humanist wedding ceremony can be as colourful, special and diverse as you and your love.
I always ask couples that book me as a humanist celebrant for their weddings why they chose a humanist wedding ceremony. While there are as many personal reasons to want a humanist wedding ceremony as there are unique couples, three reasons always top the list.
The 3 top reasons for choosing a humanist wedding ceremony:
1. The most common - and obvious - reason is that couples do not want a religious wedding ceremony. If none of you are religious and do not live your lives in any way according to a religious tradition, then you’re likely to feel uncomfortable with a religious ceremony filled with promises to (a) God(s) that you do not believe in. Your wedding ceremony should honour your past and how you found each other, celebrate your present and look forward to your future together with realistic, honest and personal promises to each other. Committing to each other with vows that are truly meaningful to you as a couple is just … wow - nothing else matters (one of my couples literally used the lyrics from ‘Nothing else matters’ by Metallica in their ceremony).
2. The second most popular reason for having a humanist wedding is to be able to have a personal, fun and meaningful ceremony. You can personalise all the elements of your ceremony. There are no restrictions* to what you can include or personalise, whether that be music, readings, communal singing, dancing or symbolic actions. Just like vows can be personalised so that they are meaningful to you, so can symbolic acts. If you are exchanging rings, you don’t have to do it the traditional way. You don’t even have to exchange rings. Exchange something else that is meaningful to you. You could do handfasting with any type of ribbon, rope, string og textile that are really personal to you. What really sets the mood, the intention and style of a ceremony is music. What songs or pieces of music mirror how you feel about each other or marriage in general? Choose according to how you really feel. Do you.
Beach weddings 💚
3. The bronze medal goes to: the option of having a wedding ceremony in an unlicensed venue, most commonly outdoors. If the beach is where you feel at home, then you could have your wedding ceremony with sand between your toes or maybe on the pebbles of Brighton beach (like Ruby and Will did in the photo above)? If your heart beats louder in the woods, then a woodland wedding ceremony you shall have. Or, if the most beautiful building you ever came across on your road trip holiday is the only place you can imagine getting married in, let’s make it happen. Because, a humanist wedding ceremony does not have to take place indoors, or in a licensed venue (although it certainly can, if you want). You can get married wherever you like, when you have a humanist wedding ceremony.
Most other reasons are closely connected to the top 3 reasons above, such as being able to do something out of the ordinary, having it in an unusual location (you can literally have it anywhere it is physically possible) and being able to create your own rituals that are meaningful for you. In a nutshell, it’s really about creating a wedding ceremony that fits your whole wedding day and your whole selves in the most wholehearted way.
The reason that fabulous couples out there chose a humanist wedding ceremony: to be wholeheartedly real and inclusive. I want to help you celebrate and mark your special day of commitment to each other in a way that honours the real you and embraces all that you are.
It is the most wonderful thing to be able to provide a wedding ceremony according to someone’s exact wishes - that is the absolute beauty of doing humanist weddings. Tell me your reasons, and I’ll do my best to fulfil them!**
You’re very unlikely to get a registrar, or even a priest, to promise that!
*We will have to follow current Covid-protocols, so there might be some restrictions that I have no control over.
**Except, of course, delivering religious ceremonies (although feel free to provide your own small element of faith in the ceremony, if it is important to you/someone you love).
